Recovered by simon, originally posted at the following link, reposted here for convenience of reading the posts, replies etc. note:due to the nature of this process, some formatting may be lost and some misspellings may arise.
Original Recovery link:
viewtopic.php?p=7508
OP- Feelinggoodgoodfeeling: Hello friends
I am here because I would like to try better feeling thoughts and I know they bring a sense of relief but Sometimes I try this and can't reach it.
In this process, I state how I feel about a situation and then I express the same but more accurate. After this I can't proceed further to reach for relief.
Is there examples about it?
Finding better feeling thoughts (Pages 1-2)
Re: Finding better feeling thoughts Pages 1-2
WellBeing:
Once I've done this, I would then take what I've written (I give myself plenty of space, at the margins and in between each and every line, so that I've have room for this next step) and massage what I've written so that I find ways to thinking about my situation so that my new thoughts still seem true to me yet feel better.
Notice my approach is different from what you described.
WellBeing: If I were doing what you're wanting to do, I would write out the thoughts and stories I'm thinking about my situation.Originaly Posted by Feelinggoodgoodfeeling ca
Hello friends
I am here because I would like to try better feeling thoughts and I know they bring a sense of relief but Sometimes I try this and cant reach it.
In this process, I state how I feel about a situation and then I express the same but more accurate. After this I can't proceed further to reach for relief.
Once I've done this, I would then take what I've written (I give myself plenty of space, at the margins and in between each and every line, so that I've have room for this next step) and massage what I've written so that I find ways to thinking about my situation so that my new thoughts still seem true to me yet feel better.
Notice my approach is different from what you described.
WellBeing: How about you bring a piece of some situation you're working on and post your thoughts about that situation and then how you're massaging those thoughts of yours about that situation into something which still seems true to you yet feels better?Originaly Posted by Feelinggoodgoodfeeling ca
Is there examples about it?
Re: Finding better feeling thoughts Pages 1-2
Consciously:
A simple situation: Let's say I am in a hurry to get out the door and can't find my keys, I get myself worked a bit up about it, feel stressed that they are lost, that I'll be late, etc. Then I stop myself, remind myself that nothing is ever lost, that I can call the people I am going to meet, and that they will understand. I still can't find my keys, but I feel better about the whole situation (and then I usually find my keys). I don't try to convince myself it's great that I cannot find my keys that moment, for me that wouldn't be realistic, but my experience is that once I make peace with the situation and feel a bit better about it, there's a positive domino effect on the rest of my day
It's really about looking at the situation at hand and then talk yourself into feeling that it's not as bad as you think it is. Stop when you feel that you've reached too far emotionally, let the best feeling you can reach settle in, and then give it a go later.
C
A simple situation: Let's say I am in a hurry to get out the door and can't find my keys, I get myself worked a bit up about it, feel stressed that they are lost, that I'll be late, etc. Then I stop myself, remind myself that nothing is ever lost, that I can call the people I am going to meet, and that they will understand. I still can't find my keys, but I feel better about the whole situation (and then I usually find my keys). I don't try to convince myself it's great that I cannot find my keys that moment, for me that wouldn't be realistic, but my experience is that once I make peace with the situation and feel a bit better about it, there's a positive domino effect on the rest of my day
It's really about looking at the situation at hand and then talk yourself into feeling that it's not as bad as you think it is. Stop when you feel that you've reached too far emotionally, let the best feeling you can reach settle in, and then give it a go later.
C
Re: Finding better feeling thoughts Pages 1-2
WellBeing:
Thanks for helping out our friend with your example. If you don't mind, I'm going to "borrow" your example (without any criticism or judgment, I assure you) because it really reflects what goes on in the posts of our friend, Fggf (I'm feeling lazy today), and, therefore, in fggf's "work."
This is what often happens in your threads, where you describe the conditions of your issue (whether it's your car or your job, etc.--doesn't matter). We get a clear description of your conditions (and that's all right) but without your thoughts you're thinking or the stories you're telling yourself about your conditions. And to make sure we're on the same page, when I talk about "stories," I'm meaning a collection of thoughts that we've organized, usually into some sort of narrative. There's nothing wrong with "stories." We all do it. We humans are meaning-making machines and we make meaning of our world and our experience through our stories. It's just natural to all of us.
Back to C's wonderful example....
So, we know the conditions of what's going on (lost keys) but we don't really know C's thoughts and stories about those conditions. As I said, that's key, for two reasons. First off, it's those thoughts and stories which produce how we feel. In C's example, it's C's thoughts and stories which are making them feel "stressed."
C is feeling stressed (a negative emotion) because C's thoughts and stories are different from what C's IB is thinking about those very same conditions. It's that difference that's causing C's negative emotion of "stressed." That's how emotions are created--by any difference or agreement between the thoughts (and stories) we're thinking about a topic and the thoughts (and stories) our IB is thinking about that very same topic at that very same time.
I still don't know what C is thinking about their lost-key condition. I just know--because C told us they're feeling negative emotion ("stressed") --that those thoughts disagree to some degree from the thoughts that C's IB is thinking about their lost-key condition.
Fggf, you've heard us tell you that Abraham's "only one answer" is to "feel better." This brings me to my second reason why the thoughts and stories are key. I know you understand what I've just said about how emotions are made, so you know that the way to accomplish that "feel better" is to find thoughts which are in greater agreement with the thoughts that your IB is thinking about your issue. Okay, then, how do we do that? (Great question! I'm glad you asked.)
This is where Abraham's idea of the "journey" comes in handy. We start from where we are and we feel around so that we find thoughts which feel better. Read that over again carefully, because it's important. In all our journeys in this world, we start from where we are. Your navigational system can plot a route for you because it knows where you are. Without that knowledge, your navigational system can't plot a route for you. Similarly it you were to ask me for directions somewhere, in order for me to give you helpful directions, I would need to know where you are, where you're starting from. To borrow Abraham's famous example of J&E's road trip to San Diego, the directions change dramatically whether J&E start from Phoenix (which is almost due west of San Diego) or from San Francisco (which is almost due north of San Diego). Are you beginning to see how important the starting point--where you are--is to every journey.
In our vibrational journeys, our starting point is the thoughts and stories we're thinking right now about our issue. We need to know what those thoughts and stories are so that we can start on our vibrational journeys.
This is the missing piece in C's example to you.
Let me give you a practical example of what I'm talking about....
But let's say C's thoughts were something along the lines of:
"OMG! They've taken Dad from the home to the hospital. It sounds bad, really bad. And he doesn't do well with change, what with his dementia. He gets defensive and aggressive. He's just trying to protect and defend himself and he doesn't really know what's going on, but that's going to make him a difficult-really difficult patient. And that could interfere with critical care he needs right now. I gotta get to the hospital. I'm the only one who can talk to him and calm him down. If I don't get there, he could die. I don't want him to die. I don't want his death on my head..."
Imagine having a friend in this situation, thinking these thoughts that I've fust posted, and you telling your friend the suggestions that were in C's reply. (Im NOT criticising you, C. You're brilliantly helping me make a point to our friend.) Your friend would look at you like you were crazy. They might even take the opportunity to vent some of their stress at you:
"Whaddya mean 'nothing is ever lost'?! Did you not hear me?!! My keys are lost!!! I can't find my keys. I need to find my keys and my keys...are LOST!!!!"
Not really soothing at all, if you can imagine.
C's suggestions wouldn't be soothing here, because those suggestions from C's example don't speak to the thoughts that your friend is actually thinking about this situation at that time. The suggestions don't meet you friend at their starting point--where your friend actually is--and don't address what your friend actually is thinking. It's like those suggestions aren't even listening to your friend in the first place (and "not listening" is ar unhelpful way to start effective soothing, right?). The suggestions don't help your friend shift any of their thoughts, because the suggestions don't address the thoughts that your friend is actually thinking, that thoughts that are bothering her.
It's like if a friend came to you because "the only one for me" dumped her (etc., etc., etc.) and you started talking about how there's all this wonderful free air to breath and the earth is in perfect proximity to other planets. You'd be right, of course. There is all this wonderful free, relatively clean air to breath and the earth is spinning in perfect proximity to other planets. But your thoughts don't address what your friend is talking about. You aren't meeting her at her starting point so you're not helpfully guiding her along her vibrational journey.
As I read your threads, Fggf, this is the key piece that's usually missing from your posts (here in the discussion sub-forum and in your various practice threads).
The other problem that not starting where you are seems to create for you, Fggf, is a tendency to leap to far from where you are. And that makes sense (it's unhelpful but it makes sense) because, when you're not aware of where you are, it's harder to gauge when you're trying to leap too far.
You often want to leap over the negative emotions (which would feel better and would be sustainable than the worse-feeling negative emotions that you are already feeling) all!lI!! the way over to "positive" and airy-fairy emotions. You may remember, when we've discussed this, we've talked about the story of Marc's tall building. When you try to leap from the ground floor (or even a lower floor) alllill the way to the top floor, the LoA is going to do its thing and pull you back down to the thoughts and vibration that you'd been practicing, just like gravity--in a physical building--does its thing and pulls you back down to the floor you leapt up from, usually with painful results.
The solution to this is to "take the stairs," meaning "work" your way up the Scale, even through those so-called "negative" emotions, which aren't "bad" and which WILL provide you with relief, if you're guided by your emotional guidance system. This is where that "...thoughts which still seem true to you..." piece that I often mention comes in handy. One of the ways we can tell we're not really "taking the stairs" and we're trying to make too big of a leap is when we start using in our "work" thoughts which don't really seem true to us, thoughts that seem more like "wishful thinking" or "hoping" or "fixing our problems" or "making stuff happen," just to name a few. No one likes knowing they're being lied to. That just doesn't feel any form of "good" And you KNOW when you're Iying to yourself--better than anyone else on this planet. That " thoughts which still seem true to you... or"..thoughts you can easily Believe right now..."piece is a really helpful double-check for your "work."
Thanks for helping out our friend with your example. If you don't mind, I'm going to "borrow" your example (without any criticism or judgment, I assure you) because it really reflects what goes on in the posts of our friend, Fggf (I'm feeling lazy today), and, therefore, in fggf's "work."
Fggf, I want to point out that this is very similar to your posts here on this forum. (And that's all right. This is a wonderful teaching example.) What C (told you; feeling lazy today © ) has done is described the conditions (in a hurry, lost the keys, likely to be late) but without telling us what C is thinking about those conditions. This is going to be key later.Consciously c
A simple situation: Let's say I am in a hurry to get out the door and can't find my keys, I get myself worked a bit up about it, feel stressed that they are lost, that I'll be late, etc.
This is what often happens in your threads, where you describe the conditions of your issue (whether it's your car or your job, etc.--doesn't matter). We get a clear description of your conditions (and that's all right) but without your thoughts you're thinking or the stories you're telling yourself about your conditions. And to make sure we're on the same page, when I talk about "stories," I'm meaning a collection of thoughts that we've organized, usually into some sort of narrative. There's nothing wrong with "stories." We all do it. We humans are meaning-making machines and we make meaning of our world and our experience through our stories. It's just natural to all of us.
Back to C's wonderful example....
So, we know the conditions of what's going on (lost keys) but we don't really know C's thoughts and stories about those conditions. As I said, that's key, for two reasons. First off, it's those thoughts and stories which produce how we feel. In C's example, it's C's thoughts and stories which are making them feel "stressed."
C is feeling stressed (a negative emotion) because C's thoughts and stories are different from what C's IB is thinking about those very same conditions. It's that difference that's causing C's negative emotion of "stressed." That's how emotions are created--by any difference or agreement between the thoughts (and stories) we're thinking about a topic and the thoughts (and stories) our IB is thinking about that very same topic at that very same time.
I still don't know what C is thinking about their lost-key condition. I just know--because C told us they're feeling negative emotion ("stressed") --that those thoughts disagree to some degree from the thoughts that C's IB is thinking about their lost-key condition.
Fggf, you've heard us tell you that Abraham's "only one answer" is to "feel better." This brings me to my second reason why the thoughts and stories are key. I know you understand what I've just said about how emotions are made, so you know that the way to accomplish that "feel better" is to find thoughts which are in greater agreement with the thoughts that your IB is thinking about your issue. Okay, then, how do we do that? (Great question! I'm glad you asked.)
This is where Abraham's idea of the "journey" comes in handy. We start from where we are and we feel around so that we find thoughts which feel better. Read that over again carefully, because it's important. In all our journeys in this world, we start from where we are. Your navigational system can plot a route for you because it knows where you are. Without that knowledge, your navigational system can't plot a route for you. Similarly it you were to ask me for directions somewhere, in order for me to give you helpful directions, I would need to know where you are, where you're starting from. To borrow Abraham's famous example of J&E's road trip to San Diego, the directions change dramatically whether J&E start from Phoenix (which is almost due west of San Diego) or from San Francisco (which is almost due north of San Diego). Are you beginning to see how important the starting point--where you are--is to every journey.
In our vibrational journeys, our starting point is the thoughts and stories we're thinking right now about our issue. We need to know what those thoughts and stories are so that we can start on our vibrational journeys.
This is the missing piece in C's example to you.
Let me give you a practical example of what I'm talking about....
Now, in composing their example and their post, C knew what they were thinking about their lost-key issue, so they came up with these thoughts, which probably (hopefully) spoke to their thoughts, in the same way that we would speak to a dear friend who had come to us with our issue.Consciously c
Then I stop myself, remind myself that nothing is ever lost, that I can call the people I am going to meet, and that they will understand. I still can't find my keys, but I feel better about the whole situation (and then I usually find my keys).
But let's say C's thoughts were something along the lines of:
"OMG! They've taken Dad from the home to the hospital. It sounds bad, really bad. And he doesn't do well with change, what with his dementia. He gets defensive and aggressive. He's just trying to protect and defend himself and he doesn't really know what's going on, but that's going to make him a difficult-really difficult patient. And that could interfere with critical care he needs right now. I gotta get to the hospital. I'm the only one who can talk to him and calm him down. If I don't get there, he could die. I don't want him to die. I don't want his death on my head..."
Imagine having a friend in this situation, thinking these thoughts that I've fust posted, and you telling your friend the suggestions that were in C's reply. (Im NOT criticising you, C. You're brilliantly helping me make a point to our friend.) Your friend would look at you like you were crazy. They might even take the opportunity to vent some of their stress at you:
"Whaddya mean 'nothing is ever lost'?! Did you not hear me?!! My keys are lost!!! I can't find my keys. I need to find my keys and my keys...are LOST!!!!"
Not really soothing at all, if you can imagine.
C's suggestions wouldn't be soothing here, because those suggestions from C's example don't speak to the thoughts that your friend is actually thinking about this situation at that time. The suggestions don't meet you friend at their starting point--where your friend actually is--and don't address what your friend actually is thinking. It's like those suggestions aren't even listening to your friend in the first place (and "not listening" is ar unhelpful way to start effective soothing, right?). The suggestions don't help your friend shift any of their thoughts, because the suggestions don't address the thoughts that your friend is actually thinking, that thoughts that are bothering her.
It's like if a friend came to you because "the only one for me" dumped her (etc., etc., etc.) and you started talking about how there's all this wonderful free air to breath and the earth is in perfect proximity to other planets. You'd be right, of course. There is all this wonderful free, relatively clean air to breath and the earth is spinning in perfect proximity to other planets. But your thoughts don't address what your friend is talking about. You aren't meeting her at her starting point so you're not helpfully guiding her along her vibrational journey.
As I read your threads, Fggf, this is the key piece that's usually missing from your posts (here in the discussion sub-forum and in your various practice threads).
The other problem that not starting where you are seems to create for you, Fggf, is a tendency to leap to far from where you are. And that makes sense (it's unhelpful but it makes sense) because, when you're not aware of where you are, it's harder to gauge when you're trying to leap too far.
You often want to leap over the negative emotions (which would feel better and would be sustainable than the worse-feeling negative emotions that you are already feeling) all!lI!! the way over to "positive" and airy-fairy emotions. You may remember, when we've discussed this, we've talked about the story of Marc's tall building. When you try to leap from the ground floor (or even a lower floor) alllill the way to the top floor, the LoA is going to do its thing and pull you back down to the thoughts and vibration that you'd been practicing, just like gravity--in a physical building--does its thing and pulls you back down to the floor you leapt up from, usually with painful results.
The solution to this is to "take the stairs," meaning "work" your way up the Scale, even through those so-called "negative" emotions, which aren't "bad" and which WILL provide you with relief, if you're guided by your emotional guidance system. This is where that "...thoughts which still seem true to you..." piece that I often mention comes in handy. One of the ways we can tell we're not really "taking the stairs" and we're trying to make too big of a leap is when we start using in our "work" thoughts which don't really seem true to us, thoughts that seem more like "wishful thinking" or "hoping" or "fixing our problems" or "making stuff happen," just to name a few. No one likes knowing they're being lied to. That just doesn't feel any form of "good" And you KNOW when you're Iying to yourself--better than anyone else on this planet. That " thoughts which still seem true to you... or"..thoughts you can easily Believe right now..."piece is a really helpful double-check for your "work."
Re: Finding better feeling thoughts Pages 1-2
Consciously :
Happy you could use my example to build on WB
Funny you should mention dementia, remember I wrote about my father being diagnosed with it last year and how bad I had felt at first? I saw him in person the first time in a year this summer (Covid travel restrictions), and he was just doing wonderfully, no deterioration at all
The thing for me, fggf, is that I am so used to practicing the teachings now that I know everything starts with me and the thoughts I think, so even if something "bad" happens, I know that the conditions are my manifestations and that I create my own reality with the thoughts I choose to think about them. It is a very empowering place to be, I have gone from freaking myself out some years ago over one potential client not getting back to me and thinking that I would never be able to get the clients I thought I needed, to now being contacted to work directly with CEOs of major companies, something that people in my sector rarely do. For this I've done nothing but setting my intentions, meditated every day and just gone about feeling the best that I can in any situation.
It's a habit you build, I started out doing the processes, especially EGS work, I read the books and was very inspired by posts from the many wonderful people on this forum, especially those who described how they had applied the teachings in their own life, and now it's almost exclusively a mental process for me.
You should try to describe the situation you want to feel better about, it'll be easier to give you input.
Happy you could use my example to build on WB
Funny you should mention dementia, remember I wrote about my father being diagnosed with it last year and how bad I had felt at first? I saw him in person the first time in a year this summer (Covid travel restrictions), and he was just doing wonderfully, no deterioration at all
The thing for me, fggf, is that I am so used to practicing the teachings now that I know everything starts with me and the thoughts I think, so even if something "bad" happens, I know that the conditions are my manifestations and that I create my own reality with the thoughts I choose to think about them. It is a very empowering place to be, I have gone from freaking myself out some years ago over one potential client not getting back to me and thinking that I would never be able to get the clients I thought I needed, to now being contacted to work directly with CEOs of major companies, something that people in my sector rarely do. For this I've done nothing but setting my intentions, meditated every day and just gone about feeling the best that I can in any situation.
It's a habit you build, I started out doing the processes, especially EGS work, I read the books and was very inspired by posts from the many wonderful people on this forum, especially those who described how they had applied the teachings in their own life, and now it's almost exclusively a mental process for me.
You should try to describe the situation you want to feel better about, it'll be easier to give you input.
Re: Finding better feeling thoughts Pages 1-2
WellBeing:
Excellent! I'm so glad to hear that.Consciously c:
...and he was just doing wonderfully, no deterioration at all
Re: Finding better feeling thoughts Pages 1-2
Feelinggoodgoodfeeling:
Oh what a feeling of friendliness and some laughs between the lines of laziness...
Can we tell a story without not be trapped into the conditions of what is or was that led to it?
How can I know a story about a condition? How can I know what I am thinking about a condition?
Most of these thoughts feel like guilt.
How I would soothe this:
If I arrive late at work, I will explain myself and I will be honest with them. I can call them before and let them know that I will arrive late.
This is just my thinking. That is not their thinking. Overall I think I contribute fairly enough for this company.
I am a good, competent employee and I do not have to feel guilt because I am organized, and most of my days I do know where my keys are and I arrive on time. It is not my fault at all. Could it be someone put it in other place, it does not matter.
I have countless of times where I stand out of my way to contribute to the successful work of the projects and the company.
It is all okay.
I am competent and enjoy to see the positive effect of my contributions in this company.
I like to feel that all is well and I relate well with main Manager, RHs and all people in this company.
Actually this company has a flexible time schedule to me and I can take a free day or half a day if I want or need to.
I can relax for now. All is well.
How deep should a person dig on a story?
I know there is value in climbing the staircase step by step, but I do not want to take the next step if I need to go a bit deeper in a current thought in order to find some old beliefs or fine, sincere emotions. I also do not want to go deeper if it feels bad, because my goal is to soothe, feel better, find relief.
How do you balance this?
I appreciate your replies C and WB. Being "named" "Fggf" looks good to me. The letters are like a mirror.by WellBeing:
Thanks for helping out our friend with your example. If you don't mind, I'm going to "borrow" your example (without any criticism or judgment, I assure you) because it really reflects what goes on in the posts of our friend, Fggf (I'm feeling lazy today), and, therefore, in fggf's "work."
Oh what a feeling of friendliness and some laughs between the lines of laziness...
So it does mean that it has value to tell the story. I often think about the story as what I immediate think about a subject. So, that is my "story" most honest and sincere or "real" in my current way of thinking. Telling a story is letting my mind express through words, emotions and everything until it is all expressed. Telling a story in this way where any hidden thought is left behind, is framed in explanation of conditions. Is this correct?WellBeing
Fggf, I want to point out that this is very similar to your posts here on this forum. (And that's all right. This is a wonderful teaching example.) What C (told you; feeling lazy today ) has done is described the conditions (in a hurry, lost the keys, likely to be late) but without telling us what Cis thinking about those conditions. This is going to be key later.
This is what often happens in your threads, where you describe the conditions of your issue (whether it's your car or your job, etc.--doesn't matter). We get a dear description of your conditions (and that's all right) but without your thoughts you're thinking or the stories you're telling yourself abou your conditions. And to make sure we're on the same page, when I talk about "stories," I'm meaning a collection of thoughts that we've organized, usually into some sort of narrative. There's nothing wrong with "stories." We all do it. We humans are meaning-making machines and we make meaning of our world and our experience through our stories. It's just natural to all of us.
Back to C's wonderful example....
So, we know the conditions of what's going on (lost keys) but we don't really know C's thoughts and stories about those conditions. As I said, that's key, for two reasons. First off, it's those thoughts and stories which produce how we feel. In C's example, it's C's thoughts and stories which are making them feel "stressed."
C is feeling stressed (a negative emotion) because C's thoughts and stories are different from what C's IB is thinking about those very same conditions. It's that difference that's causing C's negative emotion of "stressed." That's how emotions are created--by any difference or agreement between the thoughts (and stories) we're thinking about a topic and the thoughts (and stories) our IB is thinking about that very same topic at that very same time.
I still don't know what C is thinking about their lost-key condition. I just know--because C told us they're feeling negative emotion ("stressed"--that those thoughts disagree to some degree from the thoughts that C's IB is thinking about their lost-key condition.
Can we tell a story without not be trapped into the conditions of what is or was that led to it?
How can I know a story about a condition? How can I know what I am thinking about a condition?
After reading carefully your posts, and Consciously, what I understand is that in the example the "stress" feeling about the missing keys means that there is a story behind. For example: "I will be late to work, and I will cause bad impression to the main Manager and RHs, they will lose respect, I will be left out of promotions, I am so bad, I feel so guilty, I should have been more organized, should be more careful and attentive to my keys."WellBeing a
Fggt, you've heard us tell you that Abraham's "only one answer" is to "feel better." This brings me to my second reason why the thoughts and stories are key. I know you understand what I've just said about how emotions are made, so you know that the way to accomplish that "feel better" is to find thoughts which are in greater agreement with the thoughts that your Iß is thinking about your issue. Okay, then, how do we do that? (Great question! I'm glad you asked.)
This is where Abraham's idea of the "journey" comes in handy. We start from where we are and we feel around so that we find thoughts which feel better. Read that over again carefully, because it's important. In all our journeys in this world, we start from where we are. Your navigational system can plot a route for you because it knows where you are. Without that knowledge, your navigational system can't plot a route for you. Similarly, if you were to ask me for directions somewhere, in order for me to give you helpful directions, I woukd need to know where you are, where you're starting from. To borrow Abraham's famous example of I&.E's road trip to San Diego, the directions change dramatically whether ISE start from Phoenix (which is almost due west of San Diego) or from San Francisco (which is almost due north of San Diego). Are you beginning to see how important the starting point -where you are-is to every journey.
In our vibrational journeys, our starting point is the thoughts and stories we're thinking right now about our issue. We need to know what those thoughts and stories are so that we can start on our vibrational journeys. This is the missing piece in C's example to you
Let me give you a practical example of what I'm talking about...
Now, in composing their example and their post, C knew what they were thinking about their lost-key issue, so they came up with these thoughts, which probably (hopefully) spoke to their thoughts, in the same way that we would speak to a dear friend who had come to us with our issue.
But let's say C's thoughts were something along the lines of:
ONe The ve taken Pad rom the home to the host rol. sounds bad, real a ht he do ge de we with change, hit with i deme on, He gets defensio naressie, in us yi to protect ane, de end himself and he does real row whats going on, but that going to
Imagine having a friend in this situation, thinking these thoughts that I've just posted, and you telling your friend the suggestions that were in C's reply. (I'm NOT criticising you, C. You're brilliantly helping me make a point to our friend.) Your friend would look at you like you were crazy. They might even take the opportunity to vent some of their stress at you:
Whaddya mean 'nothing is ever lost'?! Did you not hear me?!! My keys are lost!!! I can't find my keys. I need to find my keys and my keys...are LOST!!!!"
Not really soothing at all, if you can imagine.
C's suggestions wouldn't be soothing here, because those suggestions from G's example don't speak to the thoughts that your friend is actually thinking about this situation at that time. The suggestions don't meet your friend at their starting point-where your friend actually is-and don't addres what your friend actually is thinking, It's like those suggestions aren't even listening to your friend in the first place (and "not listening" is an unhelpful way to start effective soothing, right?). The suggestions don't help your friend shift any of their thoughts, because the suggestions don't address the thoughts that your friend is actually thinking, that thoughts that are bothering her.
It's like if a friend came to you because "the only one for me" dumped her (etc., etc., etc.) and you started talking about how there's all this wonderful free air to breath and the earth is in perfect proximity to other planets. You'd be right, of course. There is all this wonderful free, relatively dean ali to breath and the earth is spinning in perfect proximity to other planets. But your thoughts don't address what your friend is talking about. You aren't meeting her at her starting point so you're not helpfully guiding her along her vibrational journey.
As I read your threads, Fggf, this is the key piece that's usually missing from your posts (here in the discussion sub-forum and in your various practice threads).
The other problem that not starting where you are seems to create for you, Fggf, is a tendency to leap to far from where you are. And that makes sense (it's unhelpful but it makes sense) because, when you're not aware of where you are, it's harder to gauge when you're trying to leap too far The ofey or Mare ea builthe Neget you my tone ap from the fen better for we a besus ton) de than the way se te op neo the ent to go th co du are ing an eul you back the to tre to gos time abalon that you tons pra mange jumbe grey Me ve physics ou thing-e e talk eding out.
pulls you back down to the floor you leapt up from, usually with painful results.
The solution to this is to take the stairs," meaning "work" your way up the Scale, even through those so-called "negative" emotions, which aren't "bad" and which WILL provide you with relief, if you're guided by your emotional guidance system. This is where that ..thoughts which still seem true to you..." piece that 1 often mention comes in handy. One of the ways we can tell we're not really "taking the stairs" and we're trying to make too big of a leap is when we start using in our "work" thoughts which don't really seem true to us, thoughts that seem more like "wishful thinking" or "hoping" or
"fing our problems" or "making stuff happen," just to name a few. No one likes knowing they're being lied to. That just doesn't feel any form of "good." And you KNOW when you're lying to yourself--better than anyone else on this planet. That ...thoughts which still seem true to you..."
Most of these thoughts feel like guilt.
How I would soothe this:
If I arrive late at work, I will explain myself and I will be honest with them. I can call them before and let them know that I will arrive late.
This is just my thinking. That is not their thinking. Overall I think I contribute fairly enough for this company.
I am a good, competent employee and I do not have to feel guilt because I am organized, and most of my days I do know where my keys are and I arrive on time. It is not my fault at all. Could it be someone put it in other place, it does not matter.
I have countless of times where I stand out of my way to contribute to the successful work of the projects and the company.
It is all okay.
I am competent and enjoy to see the positive effect of my contributions in this company.
I like to feel that all is well and I relate well with main Manager, RHs and all people in this company.
Actually this company has a flexible time schedule to me and I can take a free day or half a day if I want or need to.
I can relax for now. All is well.
How deep should a person dig on a story?
I know there is value in climbing the staircase step by step, but I do not want to take the next step if I need to go a bit deeper in a current thought in order to find some old beliefs or fine, sincere emotions. I also do not want to go deeper if it feels bad, because my goal is to soothe, feel better, find relief.
How do you balance this?
Re: Finding better feeling thoughts Pages 1-2
Feelinggoodgoodfeeling:
Seems like you have a powerful routine. I do meditate also. It calms my mind. I feel creative, energetic, peaceful and find more things to appreciate.
Occasionally I feel like having some questions about Abraham Hicks processes about thoughts, specifically about finding better feeling thoughts. Just want to make it alright and feel truly better.
I am so glad to read your successful example about how you manage your emotions and thoughts. The results are there, working with CEOs of major companies and overall your positive confidence! How great is also reading good news about your fatherlConsciously :
Happy you could use my example to build on WB
Funny you should mention dementia, remember I wrote about my father being diagnosed with it last year and how bad I had felt at first? I saw him in person the first time in a year this summer (Covid travel restrictions), and he was just
doing wonderfully, no deterioration at all
The thing for me, fggf, is that I am so used to practicing the teachings now that I know everything starts with me and the thoughts I think, so even if something "bad" happens, I know that the conditions are my manifestations and that I create my own realty with the thoughts I choose to think about them. it is a very empowering place to be, I have gone from freaking myseli out some years ago over one potential client not getting back to me and thinking that I would never be able to get the dients i thought i needed, to now being contacted to work directly with CEOs of major companies something that people in my sector rarely do. For this I've done nothing but setting my intentions, meditated every day and just gone about feeling the best that I can in any situation.
It's a habit you build, I started out doing the processes, especially EGS work, I read the books and was very inspired by posts from the many wonderful people on this forum, especially those who described how they had applied the teachings in their own life, and now it's almost exclusively a mental process for me.
You should try to describe the situation you want to feel better about, it'll be easier to give you input.
Seems like you have a powerful routine. I do meditate also. It calms my mind. I feel creative, energetic, peaceful and find more things to appreciate.
Occasionally I feel like having some questions about Abraham Hicks processes about thoughts, specifically about finding better feeling thoughts. Just want to make it alright and feel truly better.
Re: Finding better feeling thoughts Pages 1-2
WellBeing:
So, I would say that it has (tremendous, IMHO) value to be aware of "the story," because "the story" Is your starting point for your vibrational journey. You need to know what your story is so that you can find thoughts which still seem true to yet which feel better. You can't know if your new thoughts feel better without activating your old story.
And let me be clear (because there's been some confusion when you and I have discussed this before): when I say "story," I'm simply meaning the thoughts that you think (about a subject, a person, a situation, etc.). We take our various thoughts and organize those thoughts into a nice little story.
As you become aware of these additional thoughts (and how you feel) you can decide to find better-feeling thoughts for them too, when you're ready.
Don't worry about "hidden thoughts." There's no digging and there's no analysis required in this "work." Might there be thoughts which are sort of shouted over your loudest, most pressing thoughts? Sure, that can happen.
But as you soothe and shift your loudest, most problematic thoughts, you're sort of silencing those once-loudest thoughts. When you do that,
one of two things can happen: in the relative silence you've created for yourself, you can finally hear any "hidden" thoughts (and then soothe and shift what you hear). Or you've shifted your vibration so that you're no longer a vibrational match to your "hidden" thoughts, so they're no longer part of your vibration. If they're no longer part of your vibration, you don't have to worry about them.
So, the piece in this part of your reply which confuses me is your comment about "..framed in explanation of conditions." I'm not sure what you mean by that, but it reminds me of what I've been seeing in your previous threads and, to give you the help you're seeking, I want to talk about that.
In your past threads, you've (very clearly)
Your story about a condition is what you think about that condition. You just have to pay attention to what you're thinking as you feel your negative emotions in a condition. (And I say this kindly: you and I have discussed this particular point--actually, all of these questions in this thread so far--in great detail in threads you've previously opened, some of which have almost a exactly the same title as this thread. So, I'm going to suggest that you re-read your previous threads. Maybe that'll inspire you to new, more helpful-to-you questions.)
So, now apply what I call my "litmus test." Go through what you've written, phrase by phrase, and ask yourself:
• "Do I really Believe this?" Note that capitalization. If you don't really Believe this or if it's a form of putting lipstick on a pig or if it's kind of wishful thinking or hoping, either adjust that phrase so that you can Believe it or find a replacement phrase you can Believe. Before moving on to the next phrase, ask yourself (about the phrase you just looked at):
• "Does this phrase feel better to me? Do I feel relief from this phrase?" If not, adjust your phrase so that it's still something you can Believe and you can feel relief from it.
That being said, when I do my "work,"I will ask myself a few clarifying questions. These are the same questions that is ask a friend who was telling me a story to make sure I understand what she's saying and meaning.
And I will ask them from the vantage point of being an outside listener, listening to my friend (rather than being me, assuming I know what 1 mean). For me, these clarifying questions often shine a light on some Beliefs or assumptions which might not serving me. An easy example of this could be, when I write,
"She should not have done that," I might ask myself things like, "Where is it written that she should not have done that?" or
"When she does that thing (that she should not have done) what do you think about that?" or "What makes it so bad for you when she does that?" All these questions give me more understanding about what's being said and give me different avenues to approach my "work" when I get to it.
But none of that is "digging" in my book. All the thoughts I "work" with are right there on the surface, so there's no need to "dig."
I use the analogy of climbing the stairs with a whole bunch of bags, boxes and bundles. You can move your bags, boxes and bundles up the stairs, one stair at a time. Or you can grab what you can carry and climb one stair after another as high as you can get (or as high as you want) before going back down to get the other stuff you'd left below. Both ways will eventually get you and your stuff from.the bottom of the stairs all the way to the top. And sometimes you have to do a combination of the two--like, say, when an orange falls out of your bags and bounces all the way down to the bottom stair.
So, what does this mean when you're doing your "work"? "Moving all your stuff up one stair at a time" (to me) means moving from where you are on the Scale (say, Guilt) to the next higher ring (which, in this example, would be Jealousy. Hang out there, enjoying the relief from your thoughts of Jealousy (without judging yourself for finding relief in thoughts of Jealousy*). This could be a day, a week, a month even. (Usually not that long.) And then when Jealous thoughts no longer provide you with relief and Jealousy feels normal now to you, that's your cue to move up to the next stair (which, in this example, would be Hatred/Rage) and so on.
To me, the "grab what you carry and climb the stairs" approach is to start where you are (with your current story, using Guilt again for our starting point in this example) and then move your story up to Jealousy and then up to Hatred/Rage and so on (still using my "litmus test" from above) until you call it quits for the the day or for your session. As I said, both approaches "work." They're both valid and you'll find fans of both on this Forum.
IME, the "grab what you can carry..." approach often has us going back "down" to get more of our stuff, because our practiced momentum is "down" and it takes some practice to get our momentum moving in the way we want. So, many Forum friends seem to report a tendency to "cycle" from where they'd gotten to "back down to square one" (no such thing, really) with this approach.
Try then both out and see which works for you!
*I included that parenthetical comment especially for you because, in the past, you had a tendency to want to skip over some of the "negative" emotions (even if they were "above" where you were on the Scale) because you had some resistant stories about those "negative" emotions. Use all the "stairs." They are all there for you.
I would say this differently: You ARE already vibrating, thinking and (most likely) telling "the story" (to yourself and probably your friends. And to be fair, you can't help thinking "the story" when you're in the midst of your manifestation. "The story" Is pretty much the content of "your vibration.Feelinggoodgoodfeeling: a
So it does mean that it has value to tell the story.
So, I would say that it has (tremendous, IMHO) value to be aware of "the story," because "the story" Is your starting point for your vibrational journey. You need to know what your story is so that you can find thoughts which still seem true to yet which feel better. You can't know if your new thoughts feel better without activating your old story.
And let me be clear (because there's been some confusion when you and I have discussed this before): when I say "story," I'm simply meaning the thoughts that you think (about a subject, a person, a situation, etc.). We take our various thoughts and organize those thoughts into a nice little story.
Great. That's a good starting point. As you soothe and shift those thoughts that you immediately think about your subject, you may discover that includes other things that you haven't yet been aware of, like that time when domeone else did the same thing to you or whatever.Feelinggoodgoodfeeling:
I often think about the story as what I immediate think about a subject
As you become aware of these additional thoughts (and how you feel) you can decide to find better-feeling thoughts for them too, when you're ready.
You kind of lost me there, so let me address the parts I understood and you can ask about what I didn't yet answer for you.Feelinggoodgoodfeeling:
So, that is my "story" most honest and sincere or "real" in my current way of thinking. Telling a story is letting my mind express through words, emotions and everything until it is all expressed. Telling a story in this way where any hidden thought is left behind, is framed in explanation of conditions.
Is this correct?
Don't worry about "hidden thoughts." There's no digging and there's no analysis required in this "work." Might there be thoughts which are sort of shouted over your loudest, most pressing thoughts? Sure, that can happen.
But as you soothe and shift your loudest, most problematic thoughts, you're sort of silencing those once-loudest thoughts. When you do that,
one of two things can happen: in the relative silence you've created for yourself, you can finally hear any "hidden" thoughts (and then soothe and shift what you hear). Or you've shifted your vibration so that you're no longer a vibrational match to your "hidden" thoughts, so they're no longer part of your vibration. If they're no longer part of your vibration, you don't have to worry about them.
So, the piece in this part of your reply which confuses me is your comment about "..framed in explanation of conditions." I'm not sure what you mean by that, but it reminds me of what I've been seeing in your previous threads and, to give you the help you're seeking, I want to talk about that.
In your past threads, you've (very clearly)
I don't understand what you're asking here.Feelinggoodgoodfeeling:
Can we tell a story without not be trapped into the conditions of what is or was that led to it?
Now, I'm really confused because you just told me you know what your story is. And now you're asking how you can know your story?Feelinggoodgoodfeeling:
How can I know a story about a condition? How can I know what I am thinking about a condition?
Your story about a condition is what you think about that condition. You just have to pay attention to what you're thinking as you feel your negative emotions in a condition. (And I say this kindly: you and I have discussed this particular point--actually, all of these questions in this thread so far--in great detail in threads you've previously opened, some of which have almost a exactly the same title as this thread. So, I'm going to suggest that you re-read your previous threads. Maybe that'll inspire you to new, more helpful-to-you questions.)
There's a story behind ALL emotion--"positive" or "negative"--because we manage our alignment through our thoughts (and stories are just a collection of thoughts) and our alignment produces our emotions--"positive" or "negative."Feelinggoodgoodfeeling:
After reading carefully your posts and Consciously, what I understand is that in the example the "stress" feeling about the missing keys means that there is a story behind.
There you go! That's a very nice example of a "story" about some missing keys.Feelinggoodgoodfeeling:
For example: "I will be late to work, and I will cause bad impression to the main Manager and RHs, they will lose respect, I will be left out of promotions, I am so bad, I feel so guilty, I should have been more organized, I should be more careful and attentive to my keys."
OK. I don't think the precise label is all that necessary but give yourself extra credit for going the extra step of checking in with your own emotional guidance system and finding a label!Most of these thoughts feel like guilt.
On paper, that looks good.Feelinggoodgoodfeeling:
How I would soothe this
If I arrive late at work, I will explain myself and I will be honest with them. I can call them before and let them know that I will arrive late.
This is just my thinking. That is not their thinking. Overall I think I contribute fairly enough for this company.
I am a good, competent employee and I do not have to feel quilt because I am organized, and most of my days I do know where my keys are and I arrive on time. It is not my fault at all. Could it be someone put it in other place, it does not matter.
I have countless of times where I stand out of my way to contribute to the successful work of the projects and the company.
It is all okay.
I am competent and enjoy to see the positive effect of my contributions in this company.
I like to feel that all is well and I relate well with main Manager, RHs and all people in this company.
Actually this company has a flexible time schedule to me and I can take a free day or half a day if I want or need to.
I can relax for now. All is well.
So, now apply what I call my "litmus test." Go through what you've written, phrase by phrase, and ask yourself:
• "Do I really Believe this?" Note that capitalization. If you don't really Believe this or if it's a form of putting lipstick on a pig or if it's kind of wishful thinking or hoping, either adjust that phrase so that you can Believe it or find a replacement phrase you can Believe. Before moving on to the next phrase, ask yourself (about the phrase you just looked at):
• "Does this phrase feel better to me? Do I feel relief from this phrase?" If not, adjust your phrase so that it's still something you can Believe and you can feel relief from it.
Not deep at all. I meant it above, when I said there no "digging" or analysis in this "work."How deep should a person dig on a story?
That being said, when I do my "work,"I will ask myself a few clarifying questions. These are the same questions that is ask a friend who was telling me a story to make sure I understand what she's saying and meaning.
And I will ask them from the vantage point of being an outside listener, listening to my friend (rather than being me, assuming I know what 1 mean). For me, these clarifying questions often shine a light on some Beliefs or assumptions which might not serving me. An easy example of this could be, when I write,
"She should not have done that," I might ask myself things like, "Where is it written that she should not have done that?" or
"When she does that thing (that she should not have done) what do you think about that?" or "What makes it so bad for you when she does that?" All these questions give me more understanding about what's being said and give me different avenues to approach my "work" when I get to it.
But none of that is "digging" in my book. All the thoughts I "work" with are right there on the surface, so there's no need to "dig."
It's great that your goal is to soothe, feel better and find relief. That's precisely what Abraham teach us to do and that's the goal of this "work." It's not a question of "going deeper" in a thought. For going up the Scale step by step, there are two main approaches. Both are valid.Feelinggoodgoodfeeling:
I know there is value in climbing the staircase step by step, but I do not want to take the next step if I need to go a bit deeper in a current thought in order to find some old beliefs or fine, sincere emotions. I also do not want to go deeper if it feels bad, because my goal is to soothe, feel better, find relief.
I use the analogy of climbing the stairs with a whole bunch of bags, boxes and bundles. You can move your bags, boxes and bundles up the stairs, one stair at a time. Or you can grab what you can carry and climb one stair after another as high as you can get (or as high as you want) before going back down to get the other stuff you'd left below. Both ways will eventually get you and your stuff from.the bottom of the stairs all the way to the top. And sometimes you have to do a combination of the two--like, say, when an orange falls out of your bags and bounces all the way down to the bottom stair.
So, what does this mean when you're doing your "work"? "Moving all your stuff up one stair at a time" (to me) means moving from where you are on the Scale (say, Guilt) to the next higher ring (which, in this example, would be Jealousy. Hang out there, enjoying the relief from your thoughts of Jealousy (without judging yourself for finding relief in thoughts of Jealousy*). This could be a day, a week, a month even. (Usually not that long.) And then when Jealous thoughts no longer provide you with relief and Jealousy feels normal now to you, that's your cue to move up to the next stair (which, in this example, would be Hatred/Rage) and so on.
To me, the "grab what you carry and climb the stairs" approach is to start where you are (with your current story, using Guilt again for our starting point in this example) and then move your story up to Jealousy and then up to Hatred/Rage and so on (still using my "litmus test" from above) until you call it quits for the the day or for your session. As I said, both approaches "work." They're both valid and you'll find fans of both on this Forum.
IME, the "grab what you can carry..." approach often has us going back "down" to get more of our stuff, because our practiced momentum is "down" and it takes some practice to get our momentum moving in the way we want. So, many Forum friends seem to report a tendency to "cycle" from where they'd gotten to "back down to square one" (no such thing, really) with this approach.
Try then both out and see which works for you!
*I included that parenthetical comment especially for you because, in the past, you had a tendency to want to skip over some of the "negative" emotions (even if they were "above" where you were on the Scale) because you had some resistant stories about those "negative" emotions. Use all the "stairs." They are all there for you.
Re: Finding better feeling thoughts Pages 1-2
Feelinggoodgoodfeeling:
Hello WellBeing
I have re-read your comments a few times to really sink in the message. I appreciate your contributions.
Yes, knowing where I am and what I am thinking is the first step to feel better. I have been more aware of this and wrote down my thoughts while letting myself feel the emotions.
When I think about z I can't sugar coat z thoughts. It feel down to earth and some kind of liberating to be honest about what I am thinking. Yes, I see positive aspects about z related to other topics yet it is far away from the z current topic to me where I am currently.
It is really liberating to think the thoughts where I am even if they are down the scale. That's okay. I feel freedom to let myself feel and think what I think about z topic.
Right now it is okay to feel my emotions and write down the thoughts
Hello WellBeing
I have re-read your comments a few times to really sink in the message. I appreciate your contributions.
Yes, knowing where I am and what I am thinking is the first step to feel better. I have been more aware of this and wrote down my thoughts while letting myself feel the emotions.
When I think about z I can't sugar coat z thoughts. It feel down to earth and some kind of liberating to be honest about what I am thinking. Yes, I see positive aspects about z related to other topics yet it is far away from the z current topic to me where I am currently.
It is really liberating to think the thoughts where I am even if they are down the scale. That's okay. I feel freedom to let myself feel and think what I think about z topic.
Right now it is okay to feel my emotions and write down the thoughts