Re: Quotes on Allowing & Receiving
Posted: Sat Nov 16, 2024 7:07 pm
About People-Pleasing- the good, the bad and the ugly...
(EVERYTHING ALWAYS works out for you!
HS:
Hi! Yeah, it's you!!!
Abe:
Shocking! (laughter)
HS:
Thank you! Yeah, I, uh second time in Stanford, I knew if I raised my hand, you'd call me. But I wasn't ready, and I knew that today, you' call me. So I raised my hand.
Abe:
Yeah. Yeah! The key word: I knew. "I knew..." that's why we don't just call on anybody, when you know! Yeah.
HS:
Yeah. Um, I want to not take too much time, but I'm trying to figure out if I'm between "love", "finance" and my "deep desire dreams", slash "professional". But I think I'm going to choose "professional", because this week was intense and, um, I want to know... I want any clarity on whether or not...
-I know who I am. And what I have manifested when I'm tapped in and turned on, all of that, I make powerful things happen. And, I'm grateful...
Abe:
Well, so when things happen like what you're talking about, it does a wonderful thing for you: It really sharpens desire. But it's tricky, because it sharpens your desire, and it also sharpens your awareness of where you are! It makes it really intense. And that's why it feels so strong, you see. The good news is, your desire has come into much stronger clarity!
Well, your inner being knows mostly what you want. But you know, your Inner being- you get the concept of the Vortex? Where your desires are? And you get the concept of your Inner Being, focusing there? So, can you imagine or accept, that you might live something, that might make you put another piece into that, that wasn't there, before? It might be a timing-piece. It might be a value-piece, like, bigger what you're living. It's never of not value, even if it feels like it's not going the way you wanted it to go!
It is always of value, because every subject is like a stick with two ends on it. So when it doesn't go your way, it really went your way! And your Inner Being got a stronger bead on more specifics, now, than has ever been there before. And so, it is more certain, that what's coming is going to please you, big time, than it was before that!
So, doesn't that soften your discomfort about anything?
HS:
Oh yes! I've been leaning into refinement and allowing myself to create from whatever contrast comes my way.
Abe:
Yeah. contrast is good!! That's something that humans usually aren't willing to say: Contrast is good.
It provides clarity, and it strengthens asking. But the key to the key to allowing contrast to be good, is not stubbornly trying to... affirm isn't the right word, to not justify or defend what happened.
So, talk to us!
HS:
Well, interesting you said that things happen. And so, for me, I was existing in this way, being in this way, and my personal... uh happening, was health. And it brought upon a huge crisis. Like a a crisis in confidence. And things just like, wobbly wobbly, not as a will to align and long story short, yesterday after a year and a half about um... my two bosses sat me down to discuss my exit. Um and that's where I'm... I felt like I needed to talk to you, to fine. I want to know if they asked me to stay extra for a good transition to help them, to not affect the culture, to not affect... blah blah blah. And that I can control the narrative, but I'm not sure that's in service of me, but...
Abe:
We think it is! For this reason. Because what they're calling an exit, is your new entrance somewhere.
And since the new entrance isn't obvious to you yet, then letting this exit be smoothing both ends of that out- it helps this! And it helps this not because this needs to be helped, because this is already lined up, but it doesn't feel lined up to you, now! -You got the sense of all of that, didn't you? The man in the chair just now said: "Everything is always working out for me." And you just said "Well it might be good for them, but I don't know if it's so good for me!" -We like to explain:
Things are always working out for me, in this way:
This is the way Esther writes it every day. "Things are always working out for me, and everyone else, too."
Because there's no competition! It's not a pie that you're slicing up, and if somebody else is getting a bigger slice, I'm getting a smaller slice. It's NOT like that! Things are always working out, for all of us! You're not ready for it yet, maybe you are. But as this unfolds a little bit you're going to realize that there are better things for you, than this! What has been is already become sort of limiting. And you've been feeling some of that, that that's all part of some of the angst that you've been feeling! And so, it's working to your advantage, in a big way! This is not you, winding down, into less than. Its you, winding up into more, than!
HS:
To give you just some context of where I'm coming from, is: I'm... I've always been a pleaser. My whole life. And that's one thing I've wanted to shift, and that I've been working on, and doing my personal work on that, and being intentional on my actions. And not allowing that need to like, please everyone. So that's why I want to make sure, that it's not coming from the pleaser.
Abe:
We're going to throw something back at you, and you tell us how that fits in with what you just said! (HS: Sure!)
"If I know (we're standing in your human shoes...) if I know, that things are always working out for me, and I also know that things are also working out for everyone else... am I a pleaser. Oh, I'm pleased when you thrive! I'm pleased when things are good for you! I'm pleased when things are good for me!
Am I a pleaser? Well, maybe! I'm just pleased:
-Maybe I'm tuned in, tapped in, turned on?
-Maybe I realize, that there's enough resources for everybody?
-Maybe I'm no longer competing over resources?"
HS:
Well, that I do believe!
Abe:
We know that about you, too! But in the context of being a pleaser as you hear it come from us this is the context- we know who you were, before you came into this physical body. And who you've become vibrationally, ever since! And it is our desire, that you calibrate to that part of you- not to the peanut gallery out here!
Most people are calibrating to the others, that they can see and hear and smell and taste and touch. You watch their body language. There are a lot of people, that just throw a little fit and so it changes the way you behave! So, being an effective pleaser who is a value to them, you don't cater to their whining. You praise their successes! You be like they Inner Being: You give full attention to what feels good. And you give no attention to what feels bad! And so, the only way that we mean that being a pleaser is detrimental to you, and to them, is if you're trying to be the Law of Attraction and make up for what they're not able to do, through your action.
Don't soothe whiners! Don't soothe whiners by fixing things for them.
Because all it does, is make them think that whining works.
And whining does work to a certain degree. But it doesn't work magnificently:
It doesn't give you creative genius.
It doesn't make you one of the best of the best, in terms of the way you thrive and feel, you see!
And so, the health thing is about you, taking on too much responsibility for too many people, that you don't have any power over.
For you care about their well-being, but it's like pushing a noodle. You can't make someone allow! You watch us and all the antics that we go through. We can't know it enough, to make someone know it, who is stubbornly not knowing it, right? Now, we just keep saying it over and over and over and over and over and over again- until you're ready.
You don't let it in, and so you can't make people succeed or be happy, who are in an ornery mood! It's just not going to happen. It's not going to happen.
Esther heard a comedian that she really likes... we're not doing an advertisement for anything, but she heard Jerry Seinfield say about this new Netflix thing, that is being released, called "poptart". Esther hasn't seen it, she's going to see it as soon as she can get rid of all of you! (laughter) But she heard him say, when they ask him how did he make something so wonderful happen- he says "We just get people in a good mood, and then it happens! We just try to get people in a good mood, and then it happens. We just try to get people in a good mood and then it happens!" Well, is that a pleaser? Kind of sort of, he is. But you can't get people in a good mood, if you are not in a good mood!
So if your bag of marbles is in a good mood, then you're going to encourage other people to tune in, and they're going to be in a good mood, and then wonderful things do happen collectively, as you're all working together.
But if you're in a bad mood, because you're worried about this or that, or this or that- you're trying to protect people from this or that, or this or that- that takes a toll on outcomes. We don't think your moving in your work is a disadvantage, in any way, shape or form! Its something that your Vortex has been calling you toward, for a long time. We'r going to make a strong statemen,t that you're going to hear really well: We're going to tell you a story.
There was a woman who came to a workshop, who lived in a place that she described as miserable. But for whatever reason, she kept staying there, and she kept staying there. She just kept putting up with all the things about it, that she didn't like. Then they passed a new rule, that her cat could not live there. So she's sneaking the cat around, for quite a while, because she's defiant of this. But then she decided to move. And we said: "So, you'll move for your cat?" -Cuz the cat didn't like being carried around in a paper sack, sneaking in and out. So, she moved for the cat. But she wouldn't move for herself!
And that's kind of why you'll move: Because somebody else has decided that it's not a match. But it hasn't been a match for you, for a long time time! And because you're a pleaser, and because you keep your commitments, and because you're good at what you do, you put up with stuff you didn't like, in order to help them. And that's why you're so mad! You've been putting up with stuff for them. And now they've got the nerve to say: "No"??? This could have happened two years ago, or 3 years ago, or 4 years ago or 5 years ago!
HS:
Yeah. My best friend is sitting there! You're just... you're completely validating her. I can feel her eyes and energy, over there! (laughter)
Abe: Good?
HS:
Amazing. Thank you!
from the youtube-clip: "Abraham Hicks 2024 new - From a people pleaser to a SELF EMPOWERED LEADER
Law of attraction
(EVERYTHING ALWAYS works out for you!
HS:
Hi! Yeah, it's you!!!
Abe:
Shocking! (laughter)
HS:
Thank you! Yeah, I, uh second time in Stanford, I knew if I raised my hand, you'd call me. But I wasn't ready, and I knew that today, you' call me. So I raised my hand.
Abe:
Yeah. Yeah! The key word: I knew. "I knew..." that's why we don't just call on anybody, when you know! Yeah.
HS:
Yeah. Um, I want to not take too much time, but I'm trying to figure out if I'm between "love", "finance" and my "deep desire dreams", slash "professional". But I think I'm going to choose "professional", because this week was intense and, um, I want to know... I want any clarity on whether or not...
-I know who I am. And what I have manifested when I'm tapped in and turned on, all of that, I make powerful things happen. And, I'm grateful...
Abe:
Well, so when things happen like what you're talking about, it does a wonderful thing for you: It really sharpens desire. But it's tricky, because it sharpens your desire, and it also sharpens your awareness of where you are! It makes it really intense. And that's why it feels so strong, you see. The good news is, your desire has come into much stronger clarity!
Well, your inner being knows mostly what you want. But you know, your Inner being- you get the concept of the Vortex? Where your desires are? And you get the concept of your Inner Being, focusing there? So, can you imagine or accept, that you might live something, that might make you put another piece into that, that wasn't there, before? It might be a timing-piece. It might be a value-piece, like, bigger what you're living. It's never of not value, even if it feels like it's not going the way you wanted it to go!
It is always of value, because every subject is like a stick with two ends on it. So when it doesn't go your way, it really went your way! And your Inner Being got a stronger bead on more specifics, now, than has ever been there before. And so, it is more certain, that what's coming is going to please you, big time, than it was before that!
So, doesn't that soften your discomfort about anything?
HS:
Oh yes! I've been leaning into refinement and allowing myself to create from whatever contrast comes my way.
Abe:
Yeah. contrast is good!! That's something that humans usually aren't willing to say: Contrast is good.
It provides clarity, and it strengthens asking. But the key to the key to allowing contrast to be good, is not stubbornly trying to... affirm isn't the right word, to not justify or defend what happened.
So, talk to us!
HS:
Well, interesting you said that things happen. And so, for me, I was existing in this way, being in this way, and my personal... uh happening, was health. And it brought upon a huge crisis. Like a a crisis in confidence. And things just like, wobbly wobbly, not as a will to align and long story short, yesterday after a year and a half about um... my two bosses sat me down to discuss my exit. Um and that's where I'm... I felt like I needed to talk to you, to fine. I want to know if they asked me to stay extra for a good transition to help them, to not affect the culture, to not affect... blah blah blah. And that I can control the narrative, but I'm not sure that's in service of me, but...
Abe:
We think it is! For this reason. Because what they're calling an exit, is your new entrance somewhere.
And since the new entrance isn't obvious to you yet, then letting this exit be smoothing both ends of that out- it helps this! And it helps this not because this needs to be helped, because this is already lined up, but it doesn't feel lined up to you, now! -You got the sense of all of that, didn't you? The man in the chair just now said: "Everything is always working out for me." And you just said "Well it might be good for them, but I don't know if it's so good for me!" -We like to explain:
Things are always working out for me, in this way:
This is the way Esther writes it every day. "Things are always working out for me, and everyone else, too."
Because there's no competition! It's not a pie that you're slicing up, and if somebody else is getting a bigger slice, I'm getting a smaller slice. It's NOT like that! Things are always working out, for all of us! You're not ready for it yet, maybe you are. But as this unfolds a little bit you're going to realize that there are better things for you, than this! What has been is already become sort of limiting. And you've been feeling some of that, that that's all part of some of the angst that you've been feeling! And so, it's working to your advantage, in a big way! This is not you, winding down, into less than. Its you, winding up into more, than!
HS:
To give you just some context of where I'm coming from, is: I'm... I've always been a pleaser. My whole life. And that's one thing I've wanted to shift, and that I've been working on, and doing my personal work on that, and being intentional on my actions. And not allowing that need to like, please everyone. So that's why I want to make sure, that it's not coming from the pleaser.
Abe:
We're going to throw something back at you, and you tell us how that fits in with what you just said! (HS: Sure!)
"If I know (we're standing in your human shoes...) if I know, that things are always working out for me, and I also know that things are also working out for everyone else... am I a pleaser. Oh, I'm pleased when you thrive! I'm pleased when things are good for you! I'm pleased when things are good for me!
Am I a pleaser? Well, maybe! I'm just pleased:
-Maybe I'm tuned in, tapped in, turned on?
-Maybe I realize, that there's enough resources for everybody?
-Maybe I'm no longer competing over resources?"
HS:
Well, that I do believe!
Abe:
We know that about you, too! But in the context of being a pleaser as you hear it come from us this is the context- we know who you were, before you came into this physical body. And who you've become vibrationally, ever since! And it is our desire, that you calibrate to that part of you- not to the peanut gallery out here!
Most people are calibrating to the others, that they can see and hear and smell and taste and touch. You watch their body language. There are a lot of people, that just throw a little fit and so it changes the way you behave! So, being an effective pleaser who is a value to them, you don't cater to their whining. You praise their successes! You be like they Inner Being: You give full attention to what feels good. And you give no attention to what feels bad! And so, the only way that we mean that being a pleaser is detrimental to you, and to them, is if you're trying to be the Law of Attraction and make up for what they're not able to do, through your action.
Don't soothe whiners! Don't soothe whiners by fixing things for them.
Because all it does, is make them think that whining works.
And whining does work to a certain degree. But it doesn't work magnificently:
It doesn't give you creative genius.
It doesn't make you one of the best of the best, in terms of the way you thrive and feel, you see!
And so, the health thing is about you, taking on too much responsibility for too many people, that you don't have any power over.
For you care about their well-being, but it's like pushing a noodle. You can't make someone allow! You watch us and all the antics that we go through. We can't know it enough, to make someone know it, who is stubbornly not knowing it, right? Now, we just keep saying it over and over and over and over and over and over again- until you're ready.
You don't let it in, and so you can't make people succeed or be happy, who are in an ornery mood! It's just not going to happen. It's not going to happen.
Esther heard a comedian that she really likes... we're not doing an advertisement for anything, but she heard Jerry Seinfield say about this new Netflix thing, that is being released, called "poptart". Esther hasn't seen it, she's going to see it as soon as she can get rid of all of you! (laughter) But she heard him say, when they ask him how did he make something so wonderful happen- he says "We just get people in a good mood, and then it happens! We just try to get people in a good mood, and then it happens. We just try to get people in a good mood and then it happens!" Well, is that a pleaser? Kind of sort of, he is. But you can't get people in a good mood, if you are not in a good mood!
So if your bag of marbles is in a good mood, then you're going to encourage other people to tune in, and they're going to be in a good mood, and then wonderful things do happen collectively, as you're all working together.
But if you're in a bad mood, because you're worried about this or that, or this or that- you're trying to protect people from this or that, or this or that- that takes a toll on outcomes. We don't think your moving in your work is a disadvantage, in any way, shape or form! Its something that your Vortex has been calling you toward, for a long time. We'r going to make a strong statemen,t that you're going to hear really well: We're going to tell you a story.
There was a woman who came to a workshop, who lived in a place that she described as miserable. But for whatever reason, she kept staying there, and she kept staying there. She just kept putting up with all the things about it, that she didn't like. Then they passed a new rule, that her cat could not live there. So she's sneaking the cat around, for quite a while, because she's defiant of this. But then she decided to move. And we said: "So, you'll move for your cat?" -Cuz the cat didn't like being carried around in a paper sack, sneaking in and out. So, she moved for the cat. But she wouldn't move for herself!
And that's kind of why you'll move: Because somebody else has decided that it's not a match. But it hasn't been a match for you, for a long time time! And because you're a pleaser, and because you keep your commitments, and because you're good at what you do, you put up with stuff you didn't like, in order to help them. And that's why you're so mad! You've been putting up with stuff for them. And now they've got the nerve to say: "No"??? This could have happened two years ago, or 3 years ago, or 4 years ago or 5 years ago!
HS:
Yeah. My best friend is sitting there! You're just... you're completely validating her. I can feel her eyes and energy, over there! (laughter)
Abe: Good?
HS:
Amazing. Thank you!
from the youtube-clip: "Abraham Hicks 2024 new - From a people pleaser to a SELF EMPOWERED LEADER
Law of attraction