The Abe Forum

Jenny Lee wrote: ↑Wed Dec 18, 2024 1:52 pm I feel a bit confused. I don't know whether my questions are appropriate or not. Is your partner a person? Or you are talking about your family members altogether? Because you were talking about "they"/"them" a lot?

Answer: Thanks for the response - Mainly my wife who wants to separate - I was keeping it general but also sometimes family that likes to rant around negativity and what they hate in the world vs magic that they want to create ...

You can not fully face reality and feel good when the reality is not what you want. You can partly focus upon your reality and still feel good or at least neutral because the majority of your attention is put on better-feeling thoughts/subjects etc. I often do this, when people in my life complain and it's not the best idea to stop them, I pull my attention to things like remembering their Vortices, what their Inner Being would think about the topic, or I just focus upon non-related good-feeling subjects like an interesting drama I just watched last night.

Answer: I am not sure how to focus as I have separation going on at home, I do feel sad as we have been room mates now for 12+ years where intimacy not there more room mates, so I am focused on things that make me feel good, meditaton, sleep, music, dancing or talking walks, I do miss the affection and connection to someone that is what makes me feel a bit isolated however I have been getting massages, acupuncture and things that keep me aligned like working out and going to into nature>

The most effective way is to pre-pave: When you are alone, you try your best to focus upon their positive aspects and the Vortex version of them. Their Inner Beings are not focusing upon politics in negative ways. Their Inner Beings are not pushing against anybody or anything. Just remember that always, their Inner Beings are strongly calling them into alignment on every life subject, but also don't take score, thinking that they should behave very differently on specific subjects. The more you do so, the better timing you would have with them. Like when you meet them, they are in better feeling mood, and they are not talking negative stuff. You would zig and zag with them though you are living in the same house, and less and less would you rendezvous with their negative aspects. This is LAW.

Answer : . Yes, I am doing this .

And, very importantly. Use your present experiences to get clearer and clearer about desired aspects of your desired partner, while continually finding positive aspects of your present partner. And as you get more and more aligned on this subject, you'll feel inspiration/clarity/knowing that the person is your Vortex version partner or not--you will be very clear about this. If the person is not THE partner, either you feel aligned inspiration to communicate and say goodbye. Or the person naturally vibes out of your life and you feel natural and alirght or even lighthearted. There are acutally a lot of matches out there, so if one is not drawn to you and then there must be other better matches out there. No worry, but do not hurry.

Answer: . Yes, I am looking for more things to get in alignment, it can be a bit frustrating when in same enviornment in between work and life. I am also trying to sleep more to love myself and slow the momentum.

You are a lover. So it's always beneficial for you to find positive aspects of the people you interact with often, whether you will separate or not. Even you separate, because you have done the work, then you will continually feel good thinking about the person "accidently," or meeting the person "accidently," instead of complaining or even hating which a lot of couples do when they separate or divorce--and all these emotions are quite low vibrations which influence many other aspects in our lives.

Answer: . Yes I am focused on positive and also not going down that road, it made me think of what Bruce Lee used to say: "FLOW LIKE WATER" or the book I read called "The Surrender Experiment " by Michael Singer, I was always the one over the years trying to work on and fix it so now I am just allowing the universe to take its course and let go , as creating an opening allows me to receive instead of doing or working so hard towards something that may not be aligned!

There are lots of wonderful specific suggestion and processes from Abe about this, which I think you can find on the quotation pages of this forum (viewtopic.php?t=347). Spend some time like one month to practice a process you choose and see how it works for you. But generally, for relationships, the key is to find and list positive aspects of the person and focus upon your Vortex version of the person.

I am looking for suggestions to feel better around this when someone you care about is looking at all of the things they do not like

Jenny Lee wrote: ↑Sat Dec 21, 2024 3:00 am I feel that on this specific subject, your emotions include sadness, a bit depressed (maybe). Generally speaking, it's quite low on Abe's EGS.

There was a time I felt fear around a person. I might very well have panick attack sometimes, not very severe, but clear on my body's reactions. So as soon as I was totally alone, like in cafes, I drew focus wheels about the feeling of freedom and safety. I drew lots of focus wheels. I didn't think I was actually using it accurately every statement. But I kept on practising and drewing and then it worked, and I realized in detail how this works even when the person was often around you. At first, I did zig and zag with the person, meaning I got more freedom and solitude in the same space because that person went out more often, or I would get the impulse to go out at a good timing. At that time, I couldn't write about the positive aspects, because if I felt unsafe, I couldn't do that. But as time went by, and I understood more about relationships and how to create the desired relationships, I began to be able to write positive aspects, to appreciate, to imagine...

In a word, first you'd be honest with your present emotions and then ponder what processes could work for you and practice them persistently at least for some time. And for now, I didn't use focus wheel for many years, though it worked wonders for me back then, but for now, it feels a bit hard and uncomfortable. So you should try out what work for you best NOW, not just Abe processes; whatever works for you is good.

Best wishes.

Paradise-on-Earth wrote: ↑Sat Dec 21, 2024 3:21 am
Again, I really like this post so much!

I want to stick in just for basic information and interest about "panic-attacks", that Abe teach that panic-attacks are the result of us, trying to control our divine energy and hold it under the lid, so to speak. We desire something that we learned to fear, aka, we have a bold momentum on something wanted, and in the same time a bold resistance against the desire and the energy-flow that it created. Sometimes the sudden and intense momentum of this desire throws us into the bushes, as it becomes not CONTROLLABLE any longer.

The clue to dealing with it is to understand that the energy is DIVINE. It is nothing to fear. And then, to RELAX INTO IT. To relax into trust, to relax into the unfolding, instead trying to squelch it. Which is not easy and can bring us to our thresholds, but it is a very basic spiritual skill to accomplish this unconditional trust into the flow of life, that we all must learn to master, eventually.

Jenny Lee wrote: ↑Sat Dec 21, 2024 8:04 am
Yes. But I think it is much more complicated and for some people, it needs a lot of work to finnally feel safe and get back to alignment, before they can trust. You can relax into the strong emotions and the negative emotions and physical sensation could quiet down, but the cause of the fear still exists and had strong momentum which needs the person to tackle it, in many cases, step by step, with great details.

But when one knows how the Univserse works, and practicing the knowing, it would be easier to relax and trust, and the processes one uses could be simpler and more effective.

Paradise-on-Earth wrote: ↑Sat Dec 21, 2024 1:28 pm
I completely agree that each one has their very own "path of least resistance", per example, I gave this extra-info because it was what helped *me* to instantly release my fear, after I heard what Abe spoke about panic-attacks. So, for *me*, it wasn't complicated at all, but completely clear and instantly healing!

We are all different, and different things work for different people!